Who are you when no one’s watching?

On standing in your truth as a leader – without performing

Imagine we’re meeting for the very first time. You ask me:

“So, who are you?”

The easy answer might be:
“I’m a leadership coach from Sweden. Mum to two teenage daughters, married to Johan.”
All of that is true. But… is it me?

This post is about something deeper.
Not just what you do but who you are..
Not just what you achieve – but what brings you meaning.

It’s about Truth – the final piece of the CONFIDENT framework.

When performance falls silent – what remains?

A few years ago, I attended a silent retreat at a castle. Four days without my phone, without conversation, without any need to perform. Just me, my thoughts, and a stack of notes from the past six months.

I was sitting on the bed, surrounded by books and prayers, when a sentence suddenly landed in me. A verse I had read many times before — but this time, it struck a completely different chord.
I no longer saw it through the lens of my roles, but through the lens of my identity.

And that’s when it happened:
✨ I realised that my worth isn’t found in my speed or my results.
It’s found in how I show up — as myself.

It was like a puzzle piece I didn’t even know was missing slid perfectly into place.

Confidence begins with trust

The word confidence comes from the Latin confidere – to trust, to have faith.
So confidence isn’t about being certain. It’s about daring to trust yourself, even when the outcome is unclear. It’s about standing in your truth – without needing to perform..

You are.

Leading from your identity

We often confuse what we do with who we are.
But there’s a powerful difference.

When there’s space between my identity and my performance – that’s where joy, playfulness and creativity can flow.
But when the two collapse into one – when my worth feels tied to my output – that space for presence shrinks. I become reactive, rather than grounded.

That’s why I believe Truth is so essential in sustainable leadership.
It’s not a loud voice – it’s a quiet conviction. An inner compass.

Who are you beyond performance?

I want to give you a few questions to reflect on. Answer with your heart, not logic:

💡 What makes your heart beat a little faster?
💡 What truly gives you energy?
💡 How would you describe your personality – without mentioning your job?
💡 If all your roles disappeared – who would still be there?

Write it down. Stir it up. Breathe. Let it be messy. What matters is that you begin to listen.

From inner alignment to outer leadership

When you know who you are – your direction becomes clearer.
When you feel secure in yourself – you can truly listen to others.
You don’t need to push to lead — you create space instead.

It is in that way culture changes. Not by policies, instead through being oneself and create a space where others also can be themselves.

And the most important: You'll get joy. The inner fire.
You lead from outside your unique and authentic colours - and those who meet you sees it and feels it.

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And hey – if something in this post sparked something in you…
If you're longing for a space where you can keep moving forward at your own pace – with support and direction – take a look at my new group coaching programme.

Created for you who want to lead with empathy and direction – both within yourself and in others.
And right now, something new is happening:
 I’m preparing an English version of the programme – for the very first time.
This means that if you join from the beginning, you’ll have the opportunity to help shape the experience – and receive a special introductory rate.

Are you curiouse?
Register your interest here,, and I’ll reach out for a short conversation to make sure it’s the right fit for you.

And if you’d like to take a first step today,
you’re welcome to download my Clarity Workbook – a free resource that helps you reconnect with what truly matters to you.

Because sometimes, that’s all it takes:
One small step. One little test. A new kind of movement.

Your next step doesn’t have to be big – it just needs to happen.
And it can start here. With you.

🎨 You don’t need all the answers to begin.
Start with one brushstroke. One colour. One step.

✨ Be confident – Be You.

If you’d like to hear the full story and dive deeper into the topic, tune in to the following podcast episode where I explore it in more depth: